Musings Of A Random Teen

Voice Mail (for hearts_andminds)

Fri, 07 Jul 2006 14:39:25 GMT

You have reached Joan Girardi. I can't take your call right now, so leave your message after the beep and I'll get back to you. Thanks.

Getting To Know You

Thu, 22 Jun 2006 18:48:50 GMT

Stolen from miami_nvrcloses

Here are a series of questions for your pup to answer about my pup. Answer them from your pup's perspective.

This is open to all pups from hearts_andminds, grand_cntrl_stt and the_blank_slate

My name:

Where did we meet?:

Take a stab at my middle name:

How long have you known me?:

When is the last time that we saw each other?:

Do I smoke?:

Do I drink?:

What was your first impression of upon meeting me?:

Do I have any siblings?:

What's one of my favorite things to do?:

Am I funny?:

What's my favorite type of music?:

What is the best feature about me?:

Am I shy or outgoing?:

Am I a rebel or do I follow the rules?:

Do I have any special talents?:

Would you consider me a friend/good friend?:

What is a memory we have once had?:

Have you ever hugged me?:

Have you ever kissed me?:

Do you miss me?:

Do you think I miss you?:

What is my favorite food?:

Have you ever had a crush on me?:

If there was one good nickname for me, what would it be?:

What is my worst habit?:

If you and I were stranded on a desert island, what would I bring?:

OOC

Thu, 06 Apr 2006 04:10:07 GMT

OOC: Started a new writing community specificly geared toward the pups.

questionthepups

Using the prompts found on THIS WEBSITE, questionthepups is a no pressure community for writer and role players to react and respond to questions designed to stimulate character growth, development, and understanding.

Any and all pups and muns are welcome. Multiples of pups are allowed.

Imagination and creativity should know no limits.

Come one, come all and explore.

questionthepups

Topic: Talk About A Time You Overcame Serious Self Doubt

Mon, 03 Oct 2005 23:17:25 GMT

I've never had high self esteem. Even when I was a kid. Even before Kevin's accident. Even before we knew how weird Luke was. Luke was always weird, but not in a bad way. More like a geeky kind of way. And then after Kevin got hurt, I was the only normal one. My parents counted on me to be normal. Except I didn't feel normal.

I was getting dressed for school one morning, and I happened to look out the window. An old man was in the yard, looking up at my window. But when I went downstairs, no one was there. Really strange things started happening after that. I kept running in to people who knew me, knew everything about me, and everything about the world.

I didn't tell anybody for a long time. I knew nobody would believe me. And, besides, I was supposed to be the 'normal' one. Normal people don't see God everywhere they go. In the book store, in the mall, in the cherry picker at the side of the road, in the cafeteria at school. Sometimes a man, sometimes a woman, occasionally a child.

He told me he appeared to me in a way I could recognise because his true form was beyond my comprehension. I asked him why me, why Kevin, why did Rocky have to die? He'd never give me a straight answer, only more cryptic stuff I had to figure out on my own. I used to think, what's the point of talking to God if God won't tell you anything useful?

When I told Adam, he didn't believe me. I think he said he believed I believed what I said. Which meant he didn't believe it. But why should he? Why would anyone believe it? I was just a kid, living with my parents and two brothers, going to high school. I wasn't anybody special. I wasn't somebody noteworthy that God would talk to.

//Fanon continuation of response\\

I haven't seen God for a long time. A year, at least. Maybe more. Not since I moved to the Temple with Bliss. Sometimes I wonder if He's forgotten about me. I moved on. I ate the golden apple. I married a god. I started my own family. Maybe He thinks I don't need Him anymore. Maybe I don't. But maybe I do. Maybe something's missing now. I don't think about it all the time. Only late at night, when it's quiet. When Bliss and Serenity are sleeping. When I'm laying there beside my husband, watching him sleep. Only sometimes when I hold my daughter in my arms, when she's sleeping and everything is quiet. I look at her and she's so perfect.

Only sometimes.

Topic: What is the best present you have ever given someone else?

Sat, 27 Aug 2005 17:04:56 GMT

Topic: What is the best present you have ever given someone else?

She's sleeping in my arms.

Her name is Serenity, and she's just two months old.

She wasn't planned, but that only makes her more special, because she came to us when we weren't looking. She came to us and became she knew we would see her as the most wonderful, beautiful thing in all the world.

I can still remember how I felt when I realised I was pregnant with her. I was shaking, beause, yeah. Hello. I wasn't expecting...I mean, I knew I loved Bliss and I kind of thought I wanted to have babies with him. I wasn't sure how that would work, him being a God, and well...okay, I could see and talk to the God of my world, but that was hardly the same. I really didn't even know if I coul have children with him because...because I'm a mere mortal, and he's a God.

Carrying the baby in my belly, that was something I can't even put in to words. It was...amazing. Even when I felt so sick I couldn't get out of bed without feeling weak and nauseous, I knew I was right where I needed to be. Loving her, nurturing her, bringing her to life.

When she was born, wings and all, and I saw Bliss hold her for the first time...

Okay. I've gone about this all wrong. I think I answered "What is the best gift you've ever been given" rather than "What is the best present you have ever given someone else?" Either way, the answer is my baby, my daughter. Serenity.

Topic: Favorite Time Of Day

Mon, 25 Jul 2005 14:46:36 GMT

My favorite time of day is early morning. The sky, when the sun first starts to show through is just beautiful. The colors, soft hues of red and orange and pink and blue... There's nothing quite like it. In the garden especially, where everything is in shadow, but slowly takes on the light until it starts to glow.

I'd never really taken the time to notice the sky before. As a kid, I used to lay on my back in the yard and try to count the stars with my brothers, and Luke used to always point out the constellations to me and Kevin, but it never really meant anything to me. It was just stars and sky, and it was just there.

Being a mother has changed everything. The sky is so much more than just the sky now. It's a whole new world waiting for my little girl to discover its beauty.

Birth: Backdated to June 21

Mon, 11 Jul 2005 21:39:55 GMT

It was happening so fast, her brain could barely keep up. Between he pushing, three pressure,a dn the pain, she was having a hard time keeping her focus at all. But she didn't want to miss anything. She wanted to be aware and alert when her daughter came in to the world.

She felt a sudden shift in pressure, a sudden swoosh of everything inside her. She gripped Bliss' hands all the harder as the pain travelled up her spine. She grunted and groaned, instinct telling her to push...ANd then relief as the burden within her was pushed out.

The room was deathly ilent for a moment as Aille worked furiously...and then there was a tiny cry that pierced the silence and Joan fell back on the pillows with tears suddenly streaking her face.

Tears of relief, tears of joy. She smiled at Bliss. "We did it..." she murmured, lacking any real strength.

Topic: Blue

Wed, 29 Jun 2005 14:26:37 GMT

Blue is supposed to be the color for boys.

When babies are born, little boys are wrapped in blue blankets, little girls are wrapped in pink blankets. I guess it's so people know right away if a baby is a boy or a girl.

I like blue.

I'm having a girl, and I put blue in her nursery because I like blue. Blue is calming. It's just smooth. Like the ocean, the sky, Bliss' eyes, the blanket I had when I was younger. When I think about the color blue, I feel peaceful inside.

It’s interesting how colors can evoke feelings like that. Like, universally red is angry, yellow is hopeful. I don’t even like the color yellow, so what does that say about me? I guess pastel yellow is okay, but solid yellow? No way. Yellow on the side of green? Not a chance.

I hope my baby has blue eyes like her daddy.

It's Time! (Pretty much locked to Bliss and residents of the temple)

Mon, 20 Jun 2005 15:09:20 GMT

She was in bed with a magazine, catching up on the latest fashions and whatnot back home, when something inside shifted and she felt a weird not-exactly-painful sensation. The baby was moving, but it was more than that. Different.

And then another strange sensation, more painful. Like muscles clenching. Contractions? Ow.

She gasped, mostly from the shock than anything else.

"Bliss1 Bliss!" She yelped. "Bliss, honey! Come here!"

The Countdown Begins

Tue, 14 Jun 2005 14:49:53 GMT

The baby is due next week.

I'm ready.

Being pregnant is wonderful. It's amazing. It'sreally quite amazing t think right now I'm in posession of two hearts. And soon I'm going to meet my baby face to face, hold her and love her and watch her grow.

I should have been more active with the journal. I wish I'd documented all the little things about the pregnancy. The first time I felt her move, how it made me feel. I'll try to do better once she's born, because she deserves to have all that documented.

I'm not afraid to say I'm a bit nervous. Obviously I've never had a baby before, but I guess I kind of know what to expect.

Bliss went to see my parents, to ask them to be here. I hope they come. I hate that we've grown a part. I want them to be here, to see thier first grand child. I want her to know them too.

Topic: At what moment in your life did you feel most proud?

Fri, 03 Jun 2005 05:24:32 GMT

Pride is an interesting thing. It's hard to define, really, because it's not tangible. You can't hold it in your hands and say "Ths is pride. I am proud" and yet it is very real. Very powerful.

I was proud of my brother Kevin when he learned to drive with hand controls.

I was proud of my brother Luke when he sacrificed his own feelings for Kevin.

I was proud of my dad when he stood up to his boss.

I was proud of my mom when she went back to teaching.

i was proud of Judith when she stood up to the grounds people who wanted to destroy our garden at the school.

I was proud of Smith when he sacrificed hs life to help Bliss.

These are just a few examples. And I realise I haven't listed any time I've been proud of myself. I'm not sure I've ever really felt proud of myself.

I could name any one of the people I helped back home, when God was giving me assignments. I was certainly proud of that. But, I only did what I was told. That wasn't really me. I never would have done those things on my own.

I think the moment I felt most proud was when I said 'I do' to my husband. That's when I knew I'd made it. I was somebody. I mattered. And not just because Go used me to help other people. I mattered to a wonderful, beautiful man.

Sun, 15 May 2005 23:55:47 GMT

5 Question Meme

1. Leave me a comment saying, 'Interview me'.
2. I will respond by asking you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
3. Update your LJ with the answers to the questions.
4. Include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

1. Are you looking forward having your daughter? It's a little scary to think about...motherhood is huge. It's the biggest, greatest thing I've ever done. I loveher so much already, and Ihavne't really even met her. I can't wait to hold her, kiss her, touch her. Mostly, I can't wait to see Bliss with her. As much as he loves kids already...One of his own...It's a beautiful thing to imagine.
2. How are your studies going? Okay. I'm learnin more this way than I ever learned in school. Most of it's boring, though. But I know it's important, so...
3. Do you know if your family is coming to see the baby? I don't know. I hope so. 'd like them to be here. They should be here. I know it's hard fr them, but...but it would mean so much to me...
4. What do you miss most about the States? My family. Other than that...Nothing really. There's nothing there that I don't have here.
5. How are you doing in this heat? I grew up in California where it's always hot, so I'm kinda used to it. Except carrying around this extra person makes me feel it even more than usual. I sweat all the time. I wake up and the sheets are just soaked. I don't care for that so much.

1. Is there anything I can do to make things easier for you? You're so good to me. Everything you do is wonderful. Just seeing your face, yourr smile, makes me feel better instantly. But...now that you mention it, I could use a back rub. And some Mintage ice cream.
2. Do you know how beautiful you look right now? No. My hair is flat, my bellyis fat. My ankles are swollen. I'm a mess. But I love you for saying it.
3. Do you want me to try and get your family here for the birth of our daughter? I woud love for them tobe here. I can't imagine this without them.
4. Do you want a pet of your own? I haven't thought about it. With the baby coming...I've always wanted a dog. A little one, but not too little.
5. What is your favorite color and why? Blue. Because blue is the color of your eyes and the sky on a beautiful summer day, and the ocean and...It's just the best color.

Stolen from my mun

Wed, 11 May 2005 00:09:21 GMT

Topic: Trading Places

Thu, 28 Apr 2005 00:31:59 GMT

If I could trade places with anyone...There's one person I'd want to be for a day. My husband. Bliss. I mean, come on. He's a god. And not just any old god. He's the god of Happiness and Joy.

Not only that, but he can FLY. He an flash himself from one place to another in mere moments. Who wouldn't love that? I'd be able to pop in and visit my parents anytime, and be home by dinner. That would be great.

But...seriously. The real reason? If I could get inside his head for a day, even just an hour, I'd know just what it is he sees in me. I don' question that he loves me. I know he does - it's kinda hard to miss. The way he looks at me, the way he smiles, the way he fusses over me.

It's mutual. I love him so much I can't stand it sometimes. He's made my life complete, filled voids I didn't even know I had. Before I met him, I didn't even like myself very much. Throug his eyes, I know I am worth something.

So yeah. If I could change places with someone, anyone, for a day, I'd have to pick Bliss. And then he'd be able to see himself through my eyes too.

Meme...

Sat, 09 Apr 2005 00:36:50 GMT

W0ULD Y0U...
[ ] go out with me?
[ ] give me your number?
[ ] kiss me?
[ ] let me kiss you?
[ ] watch a movie with me?
[ ] take me out to dinner?
[ ] drive me somewhere?
[ ] take a shower with me?
[ ] be my bf/gf?
[ ] have a fling with me?
[ ] buy me a drink?
[ ] take me home for the night?
[ ] Would you let me sleep in your bed?
[ ] Sing car karaoke w/ me?
[ ] sit in the doctors office with me because I didn't want to go alone?
[ ] re-post this for me to answer your questions?
[ ] give me a piggyback ride?
[ ] Come pick me up at 3 am because my car ran out of gas in the middle of nowhere?

D0 Y0U...
[ ] think I'm cute?
[ ] want to kiss me?
[ ] want to cuddle wit me?
[ ] want to hook up with me?

ARE WE...
[ ] acquaintances?
[ ] friends?
[ ] in a relationship?
[ ] gonna have kids?

AM i...
[ ] smart?
[ ] cute?
[ ] funny?
[ ] cool?

HAVE Y0U EVER...
[ ] thought about me?
[ ] thought there might be an "us"?
[ ] thought about hookin up with me?
[ ] found yourself wanting a kiss from me?
[ ] wished I was there?

ARE Y0U...
[ ] done with this survey?
[ ] happy you know me?
[ ] mad at me?
[ ] thinking about me?
[ ] going to repost this so that I will return the favor?

Arica And The Kids Visit The Temple

Sat, 26 Mar 2005 16:02:45 GMT

Joan was waiting for Arica and the kids at the airport, extremely excited to have them visit the temple. Bliss had stayed home, but sent one of the servants to accompany Joan. "This is them!" Joan practically shouted when the plane landed. She paced a little while waiting for them to get off the plane, and kept looking at her watch as if that would make a difference.

Finally she saw them walking toward her. "Hey," She called out and waved her arm wildly. She knew she probably looked stupid, but she didn't care.

Topic: Dissatisfied

Fri, 18 Mar 2005 22:38:10 GMT

What in your life are you most dissatisfied with?

I really can't think of anything. I know, that's hard to believe. But I'm genuinely happy right now. Happier than I've ever been in all my life.

I mean, if I had to say something, I'd say I'm not happy my brother can't walk. God chose me, He chose to appear to me, to send me on these missions or assignments or whatever He wants to call it. Yet He won't answer any of my God-type questions, He won't tell me why my brother had to be paralysed, He won't tell me why Kevin can't walk, He won't tell me if Kevin will ever walk.

But for me, my life, I'm happy. I'm married to the most wonderful husband in all the world. I mean come on. He's a god too, the god of Happiness and Joy. What could be better than that? But you know what? That doesn't really matter to me. I mean it matters, but that's not why I love him. When I wake up in the morning and he's sleeping beside me, I don't wake up and think, 'Oh look, it's the god of happiness and joy'. He's so much more than that.

Bliss is just amazing. He's incredible. He would do anything for anybody. Especially me. I on't have to lift a finger, if I don't want to. It's sweet, how he wants to take care of me. Mostly I let him, because I know it's his personality. And I'd be lying if I said I didn't like the attention.

So, I'm really not unhappy about anything. I m living a life most girls only dream about. I live in a temple with a god. I'm pregnant. And that...being pregnant is a whole new ball game. It's the most incredible thing I think I've ever known. I feel like I'm in possession of two hearts, which I guess I kind of am. And one day soon the baby is going to be born and she's going to be beautiful and perfect and I lov eher so much already.

So, you see, with a great husband and a precious baby on the way, I don't really have much to be dissatisfied about.

OOC

Sat, 26 Feb 2005 21:44:39 GMT

I have to apologise for neglecting Joanie. I've been sick and stressed out. All my RP babies have suffered. But Joan is still around. She's been very quiet lately, obviously.

Hopefully I'll find the motivation to get her current on topics this weekend.

Locked to Bliss

Sun, 06 Feb 2005 19:18:40 GMT

Joan wasn't sleeping so well because of the baby and the changesbeing pregnant had brought to her body. She didn't mind so much, really because she knew the cause, and she could hardly blame thie child. She anticipated the birth as the most wonderful thing she'd ever known.

And besides, she was tired of laying around in bed all the time. It waas a little before dawn one morning when Joan slipped out of the bed as gracefully as she could, trying not to disturb Bliss. She headed out to the garden, delighting in the pre-dawn beauty that greeted her there. She sat by the pond and just watched the morning come to life around her.

Topics: Exact Opposite, Funny Memory, Far From Home, Happily Ever After

Sun, 30 Jan 2005 17:41:24 GMT

What would a description of your *exact opposite* be like?

(Fanon, because...well...yeah. Fanon): My exact opposite would be me, a year ago. Living at home with Mom and Dad, questioning everything and never satisfied with the answers. Always doubting and second guessing and questioning some more.

Describe your funniest childhood memory

How to choose just one? I mean, there's so many. We used to laugh all the time.

Okay. I remember when Kevin was trying to teach Luke how to ride a bike. It was so funny because Luke just doesn't have natural balance. He was wobbling all over the place, he couldn't keep the bike straight for anything and Kevin was getting so frustrated because, I mean, how do you teach that?

Somehow Luke figured it out. And everybody clapped. But to see him struggling, he was laughing too, because if he didn't laugh he would have cried and then Kevin wouldn't have taught him and he probably wouldn't be able to ride a bike even today.

What's the furthest away you've ever been from the place you were born/created? How did you get there? Why did you go? Did you return or even want to come back to where you came from?

A year ago, I would have said Bliss' temple, but now...Bliss' temple is my home. It's a long way from Arcadia, but it's the only place I want to be.

I think...honestly, the farthest have ever been from home is the arms of Satan which was a momentary lapse on my part. How did I get there? I was entranced. I couldn't help myself. Why did I go? Because...I couldn't help myself. Satan is a very powerful trickster...I fell for his...game that day. And no, it will never happen again. I'm quite happy in the arms of my god of happiness and joy, thank you very much.

Describe what your "happily ever after" would be like

I'm living it. With a baby in my belly and Bliss' ring on my finger. With close friends gathered around us...there's nothing better in all the world.

Story Arc - OOC

Sat, 22 Jan 2005 02:04:43 GMT

Click here for links to a post-dated story arc involving Bliss, Smith, Aille, and Joan.

Update

Sat, 22 Jan 2005 01:49:26 GMT

I've been feeling really tired lately. Really, really tired. I'm sure it's just the baby, but still it's kind of disconcerting. Just to walk to the bathroom is a challenge some days.

Being pregnant is unlike anything I've ever imagined. It's really quite fascinating. I've been reading books that tell me the day to day progression of growth which is really neat. I should start to feel her move soon. That...I can't even imagine that.

Bliss is absolutely wonderful. I couldn't ask for someone to love me more. And when he looks at me...I just melt.

Smith is great too. He gives the most incredible foot massages.

Aille is great too. It's so wild that we're both pregnant at the same time.

And my family...They're back home in Arcadia, but I talk to them almost every day now. They're getting used to the truth of my life, and they're planning to come back when Serenity is born. I don't think they believe she'll have wings until they see it.

OOC: Obviously this is before the current Bliss/Smith story arc. My apologies in reguard to the fact Joan hasn't been posting much lately. RL has been wonky lately...

Recapping 2004

Wed, 12 Jan 2005 02:34:47 GMT

(Totally TM fanon even though I try to keep joanie's topic replies in canon as much as possible. This one just needs to be fanon)

2004. Wow. It's over. And...I'm not just pregnant, I'm married too. How did that happen?

I don't remember the exact day, but I think it was in April...I was taking a walk, or maybe iw as walking home from school, when he approached me. He said his name was Mister Smith and he had a message for me. Odd, because I see God. He - or she - is just some random person I meet. A dog walker, a cafeteria lady, a woman jogging on the sidewalk, a utility worker fixing a light, a really hot guy on the bus, a little girl at the park...God can be anyone, anytime. And He sent Mister Smith to give me a message.

I don't even remember the message itself. Something about I'm not alone. I don't think the message was all that important. The friendships that came of it were the reason. Smith became my best friend. He's my best friend, my father, my brother, everything all rolled in to one. And, he's responsible for Bliss, because he sent Bliss to visit me when he'd been hurt and couldn't make the trip himself.

Bliss. My wonderful, beautiful, perfect Bliss. He's the God Of Happiness And Joy. He's the father of my baby, he's the man who owns my heart. He is my whole world (at least until the baby is born, then there will be two). I can not even imagine my life without him.

My parents forced me to choose, because they didn't understand. I don't blame them. They don't talk to God like I do, they didn't know someone like Bliss could even exist. They've learned and they're still struggling with it, but...they're getting there. I don't want them to miss out on their grand daughter's life, so...I went to them just before Christmas. Bliss flew them out for the wedding and...we're making progress, it's still really hard for them, and that's okay.

Topic: Friendshiip

Thu, 30 Dec 2004 01:30:18 GMT

Can men and women be friends?

I think any two people can be friends and it doesn't matter if it's two women, two men, or one of each. Gender has nothing to do with firendship.

Gifts To Give

Wed, 22 Dec 2004 23:47:27 GMT

For Bliss, my love. I adore you.

For Smith, my hero. I love you.

For Aille, my sister. I cherish you.

For Rose, my darling. You are a joy to have around.